Dreaming the Impossible Dream

Thinking a lot about life lately . . . things that were, things that are, things that may/could be . . . like dreams.

We’ve all had dreams.  Still do.  Some were envisioned during childhood and youth, others during our 20s and 30s, and a few came later.  Some were realized, others changed.  Some we [now] laugh at, others we [still] wish for.

My mom’s a fan of Gomer Pyle: USMC, as once mentioned, so I bought the DVDs (yeah, I’m old-school, what can I say, LMAO).  Knew he could sing, but never knew he could sing until I watched the show.  One episode in particular—“The Show Must Go On”—has Gomer (Jim Nabors) singing “The Impossible Dream”.  OMG.  What a voice.  It makes me want to belt out the lyrics (fortunate are those not within listening range, LOL).

Especially spirited [moving] are these words:

That one man, scorned and covered with scars  /  Still strove with his last ounce of courage  /  To reach the unreachable star  /  To reach the unreachable start  /  For you know it’s impossibly high

A little history.  “The Impossible Dream (the Quest)”—a popular song from the 1965 Broadway musical, Man of La Mancha—was scored by Mitch Leigh, with lyrics by Joe Darion.  The song was first sung by Don Quixote (a character from 17th-century novelist Miguel de Cervantes’ Don Quixote) when he was asked what he meant about following the quest.  Quixote, by the by, had difficulty accepting the realities [struggles] of life and slipped into a fantasy world where windmills were monsters and he an honorable knight from a bygone era.

And a little trivia.  In 1968, Senator George McGovern introduced Robert F. Kennedy, campaigning to be president, by quoting the song.  It wasn’t that he thought Kennedy’s chance to become president was impossible, simply that he wanted “the audience to understand it’s worth making the effort, whether you win or lose”.  What awesome advice.  Endeavor, do your utmost, regardless of the outcome.  Strive for that impossible dream.

Dozens of singers have covered the song and everyone has his/her favorite rendition, mine being you-know-who.  I’d be remiss if I didn’t provide the lyrics and the wonderful YouTube vid showing Jim Nabors as Gomer singing the song.  It was a toss-up whether to present the long or short version.  The long has an “intro” as to how Gomer regains the voice he’s lost to stage-fright prior to a big Navy relief benefit show.  The short is simply the song.  . . . Flip of the coin.  Ta-da!  You get the long version.  Enjoy!

When days seem bleak and nothing good/positive happens, “The Impossible Dream” instills hope and restores faith.  Suddenly, nothing is impossible and that dream is within grasp. WPdream1

This is my quest  /  To follow that star  /  No matter how hopeless  /  No matter how far

Amen.

To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go

To right the unrightable wrong
To love pure and chaste from afar
To try when your arms are too weary
To reach the unreachable star

This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far

To fight for the right
Without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell
For a heavenly cause

And I know if I’ll only be true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I’m laid to my rest

And the world will be better for this
That one man, scorned and covered with scars
Still strove with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star

To reach the unreachable star
For you know it’s impossibly high
To live with your heart’s driving upward
To reach the unreachable star

Songwriters: Mitch Leigh / Joe Darion

The Impossible Dream lyrics © Helena Music Company, Andrew Scott Music, Vmg Golden Records Copyrights, Helena Music Corp., SCOTT ANDREW MUSIC

What’s Your Story?

We all have one—personal, professional, life-changing, funny, sad, and/or <insert adjective of preference>.

Given I’m a writer and blogger, it seemed appropriate to share mine.  But which one?  . . . Well, why not two or three: personal, professional, and faith-bound [adjective of preference].

♦ Personal

As I grow older and [finally] mature <LOL> I view life and events from different perspectives.

Some of us have wonderful parents, others have tolerable/fair ones, and a few have ones we wish could be returned to the Customer Service desk.  I grew up with alcoholic parents.  Mom was nasty, Dad quiet (save for glassy eyes, you could never tell he’d been “imbibing”).  I didn’t like my mother much and she—gauging by the attitude and comments—didn’t much care for me.  Childhood and adolescence consisted of humungous tummy knots and treading on eggshells.  Imagination was my BFF. WPstory2USE

The final chapter of this personal story is that I eventually realized my father did love me in his unique, undeclared way.  His own life events (including internment) had shaped him and he did the best he could considering the circumstances.  Mom had made unwise choices and blamed the world—and me—for them.  Maybe it wasn’t the right thing to do (blame someone else) but decades later I finally understood the reasons behind those choices.  I forgive her.  I even love her (she is my mother, after all) and I’ll continue to take care of her during these twilight years.

Professional

I’d wanted to be a writer since Mr. Kennedy complimented something I’d written in Grade 7 English class.  My childhood BFF, Imagination, had already nudged me into composing comics and chronicles.  Later, they evolved into books.  Confession: I wasn’t good.  At all.  Joining writers’ groups and taking classes provided guidance, and while I absorbed all I could, I didn’t necessarily apply it.

Serving as ESL and SE teacher/trainer, and technical editor, didn’t help in the creative writing front.  It was only when I heard instead of listened, read other writers (by the truckloads) and sat back with a truly critical eye that it all started falling, slowly but surely, into place.  That true “a-ha(!) moment” arrived after what seemed a short lifetime.

The final professional chapter will be written the day I finally lay down the four-ink pen and leave the keyboard behind.

Life—and work—is all about learning and growing, realizing and applying.  It’s all so very good.  Tricky and testing, but very good.

Faith-bound

Maintaining faith has been a struggle.  Although I sincerely believe in the Big Guy, his Son, and the Good Book, I—like many—frequently ask “why?”  “Why me?”  “Why this?”  “Why can’t I get a break?”  “Why . . . why . . . why?”  <LOL>  Maybe it’s easier to view ourselves as victims, to place the blame elsewhere.  Accepting responsibility and/or taking action can prove daunting.

We’re given challenges for various reasons.  In my case, I honestly believe He wants me to learn forgiveness and patience.  The forgiveness I believe I’ve acquired, the patience—hell no.  Oops.  Heck no.  I truly am my father’s daughter: he possessed none, either.

The last chapter in this story is that I will master patience.  It will continue to be a struggle, unquestionably, but it will happen.  My faith will grow and stabilize . . . and I’ll be a better person for it.

There you have it.  Three short-and-sweet stories that have shaped me and/or will continue to do so.  It feels good to purge, to wear the ol’ heart on the sleeve, to be honest and open.

The next three posts—more stories—will be authored by the trio from the Triple Threat Investigation Agency.  (Rey’s already pumped up.)

And what about you?  What’s your story? WPstory3USE

Do Better, Be Better . . . than Better

We’re almost one-quarter of the way through the year.  Time doesn’t just fly, it soars like a rocket-powered aircraft—a North American X-15.

The gals and I were chatting the other day about what’s been accomplished so far this year.  Like, have we stuck to resolutions?  Did we realize an achievement?  Did something profound or life-changing occur?  What about 2019 going forward?

In terms of the Triple Threat Investigation Agency trio, they’ve had a number of small [successful] cases.  Nothing out of the norm, per se, but every one has proven challenging one way or another.  And they’ve just started on a major one that’s promising to become quite involved—it appears there’s another serial killer on the loose.

Rey’s not quite sure why “nutcases” are attracted to them like magnetite, but isn’t complaining; she loves being a private eye, even if it sometimes gets very hairy.  To deal with loonies, JJ’s thinking psychology courses might be worth pursuing while Linda’s all for taking more intensive defense training.  They knew becoming professional P.I.s would involve danger and that’s fine.  They’ll keep going with the flow.

In terms of myself, I’m doing much the same: going with the flow as best as possible, given those curveballs Life occasionally throws at you.  Other than recently signing up with Creativia, life is streaming along like a calm, countryside brook.  The current is barely visible, but it is moving.  And it’s all good.

What would I like to have happen over the next three-quarters of 2019?  Besides making mega bucks or winning the lottery so I can leave the 9-5?  <LOL>

♦   Have less stress.  For sure, a lot of it I place on myself (I’ve always been a stresser and worrier).  So I need to crush it.  Not an impossible task.  It merely takes faith and application.

♦   Continue writing/blogging and embrace more followers.  Work with and support fellow writers/bloggers.  Not just dip my toes into that lovely, warm burbling brook, but truly immerse myself.

♦   Be more optimistic.  The aforementioned stress can dim mood and outlook.  I’d like to view life, and the world, through rose-tinted glasses . . . for a while, at least.  Reality has its merit, but idealism never hurts, either.

WPbetterUSE2   The plan, then: to do better and be better than better.

Making Choices / Feeling Good

Last weekend I posted about contracting with a publisher.  As with most things in life, I’m always a tad nervous about taking on something new (okay, a lot nervous).  Not sure why.  Just am.  Silly me, I know.

In any event, as posted, I took the plunge and signed on with Creativia.  So far, so good.  In point of fact, pretty gosh-darn good!

After joining the Creativia Facebook team, I received numerous greetings from fellow authors.  It was heartwarming to be welcomed in such a, well, welcoming manner.  <LOL>

Who knows where this [new] publishing road will lead?  All I know is that I’m pleased to be on it.  Perhaps I won’t make much money, if any (I’m a realist), but I’m definitely looking forward to this new adventure and learning all I can along the journey.  WPgoodclipartquery

Yes, having to make choices can be [very] scary—but there’s nothing better than feeling good about actually making them.

Ready to rock’n’roll with Forever Poi

Like, how many months have I been trying to get “Forever Poi” packaged/done?   Seems like many.  But it’s all good now—Creativia, “a community-driven, next-generation hybrid publisher”, has accepted me to their author roster.  There’s a lot to organize and do, but it’s all good.  One task at a time.

The front and back covers you see above will likely not be the ones used by Creativia; they’re ones my long-time designer and formatter created.  They’re much in keeping with the previous covers, though the trio do look a bit different.  Cosmetic surgery perhaps?  <LOL>

In the event you’re looking for a publisher, here are some facts about Creativia (pulled from their site):

♦   Besides their partner network, they use marketing channels: Amazon Marketing Services, Bookbub Ads, Facebook Ads, Google Ads.

♦   They cover: proofreading, cover design, eBook and paperbook layout design, worldwide publishing, marketing, sales and royalty payment.

♦   Achievements include: #1 bestsellers in major Amazon categories, book translations into nine languages, and features in high-profile newsletters.

As a fellow Creativia author advised, it’s all about what you’re willing to put into it.  As an writer, you must invest time and effort/energy.  More simply said: reap and ye shall sow.  Given my due diligence and the feedback I’ve received, I’m happy [and excited] to have signed on.

Yes, I’m feeling good about this new phase of my writing life.  As Rey’d say: keep ya posted! thumbs up

Still Lovin’ Nancy

Not long ago, I reviewed three Nancy Drew mysteries as part of a stopover in Nostalgia-Land.  Another visit—er, post—seemed in order, given I’d read three more of the YA mysteries.

Mom-care is becoming increasingly more challenging and leaving less time for me to do much for myself.  So when Mom is taking a nap, Nancy proves the perfect quick and easy read.  I’m transported back to a quiet childhood time when life was perhaps no less stressful but, somehow, simpler.

The first two are originals from the 60s while the third features a new 70s cover and is “modernized”.  For example, in the old books, Nancy’s titian-haired (brownish-orange) while in the newer ones, she’s reddish-blond.  Male cops no longer rule supreme.  And lo and behold, instead of frequently wearing dresses/frocks, the girls regularly sport jeans.

The Clue of the Dancing Puppet

A mysterious dancing puppet haunts the grounds of an old mansion, where the Footlighters’ playhouse is also located.  Amateur sleuths Nancy, Bess, and George are enlisted to help solve the case and this time we’re whisked away to the world of community theater.  The dancing-puppet mystery has added dimensions: an erratic self-absorbed leading lady and an overly charming (if not cheesy) Shakespearean actor.  Along with Nancy’s searches for clues, two jewel thieves show up on the scene.   Not a bad read; not a great read.  The keep-your-constant-interest component isn’t quite there.  A 3.5 out of 5.

The Clue of the Broken Locket

Interestingly enough, this was first written in 1934.  When I looked at the copyright page, I saw the very early date and had to check it out.  The premise back then: when adopted parents can’t take care of baby twins, Nancy goes searching for the legal birth mother with the help of a broken locket.

The newer version has two lookalike cousins (who, of course, don’t know about each other initially).  There’s a ghostly launch—love those spooky apparitions!—and a mysterious mansion that goes by the great name of Pudding Stone Lodge.  We have some sinister persons who make mystery-solving difficult for Nancy, Bess and George, and there’s record pirating to boot.  The trio certainly have their sleuthing skills put to the test.  Luckily, they have some assistance from their favorite beaus: Ned, Dave, and Burt.  I liked this one a lot.  A definite 4.5 out of 5.

The Clue in the Crumbling Wall

Our young enthusiastic sleuths—Nancy, Bess and George—have a twofold mission this time.  Not only must they endeavor to locate an inheritance concealed in the walls of dilapidated Heath Castle, they have to track down the beneficiary of a will before the proviso expires.  The grounds of the estate have a maze, a multitude of crumbling walls, and a couple of watchdogs (real ones, as well as human ones).  A 4 out of 5.  (In terms of Nancy, I suppose I’m a traditionalist: I prefer the “originals”.  It’s all about revisiting fond memories in Nostalgia-Land.) WPNDuse1

. . . Yeah, still lovin’ [needin’] the escape.

Tea & Crumpets with Personality

Recently, the trio from the Triple Threat Investigation Agency posted about three writers they’d like to sit down to dinner with.  That provided something to ponder: who would I like to dine with?

Having imparted favorite authors in previous posts, I opted for five people of days gone by that would make the love-to-meet list . . . and it would be over high tea with sweet scones and flavorsome finger sandwiches.

The selection comprises champions and rogues, the wholesome and the unsavory.

Jesus

He was/is, after all, “The Man”, a person in power, a great influence and influencer, the Son of God.  How humbling—and overwhelming—it would be to be in his presence.  I’m a believer.  Others aren’t and that’s fine: to each his or her own.  For me, though, it’s a tad disquieting to read about scholars and the like who argue whether the Jesus found in the Bible is an accurate reflection of the Jesus born just prior to the first century.  . . . But then, it’s all about faith, isn’t it?  And, while I readily admit mine can be tested and tried (frequently in fact), I’ll cling to it like a life preserver.

Marie-Antoinette

The last Queen of France was born Maria Antonia Josepha Joanna von Österreich-Lothringen (as Rey might say, gotta love a name like that).  Claimed to be a pawn, this fascinating woman was a mere 14 when married to Louis XVI (reputedly a cowardly man and unmindful husband).  There’s something about the pomp and pageant of that time, the French Revolution, the clandestine undertakings, the elaborate fashions and hairstyles that intrigue me.  Marie-Antoinette possessed notable shrewdness and strength, and amazing courage during her trial and execution.  Unquestionably, a force in her own right.

Henry VIII

I believe I always possessed a fascination for this intriguing royal figure—ever since watching Keith Michell in the spectacular series The Six Wives of Henry VIII.  At 17, he became king and presided during “creepily fascinating” periods in history: the English Renaissance and English Reformation.  The six marriages aside (which make for great soap-opera storylines), he accomplished much in terms of military campaigns, politics and religion . . . and even penned a song and wrote a book.  Definitely someone who’d provide enthralling historical accounts and gripping narratives.

Mata Hari

Another great name: Margaretha Geertruida “Margreet” MacLeod.  But the stage name of Mata Hari is so much better.  Strong-willed and determined, she realized at a young age that sexuality would get her places.  A Dutch exotic dancer, courtesan/mistress, and infamous “spy”, this attractive woman was convicted of being a double agent for Germany during WWI and executed by a firing squad.  Films like “Mata Hari”, starring the equally enigmatic Greta Garbo, fed the mystery and controversy that still surround her life.  Maybe she’d be willing to share a few intrigue-packed moments over a cup of Lapsang Souchong?

Calamity Jane

There are numerous famous (infamous) western desperados and gunslingers, and all are fairly fascinating, thanks greatly to Hollywood.  It’s hard not to feel a touch of envy re those romanticized villains, outlaws, and baddies—the thrill of riding the range, being unrestricted, having no ties.  A wild-west life would have been uncontrolled and sometimes calamitous, which makes Martha Jane Cannary, better known as Calamity Jane, the fifth companion choice for tea sipping and scone nibbling.  Losing her parents at the age of 12 compelled her to make her own way through that oh-so-wild west.  Another resilient woman, she’d have fine tales to share about her hard-drinking, rabble-rousing years . . . and those benevolent ones where she played nurse to smallpox sufferers.

WPbox1use

 

Blog Juggling

For some bloggers, posting weekly is as simple and fast as boiling eggs.  1-2-3 and—hurrah!—done.  For a few, it’s a bit of a challenge to come up with fresh/unique ideas.  And for others, like a stumped IT specialist, it’s scratch-the-ol’-noggin’ time. WPgifWritingscratchingheadGifer

The first idea that came to this mind: continue with the theme of who to invite to dinner.  Hmm.  Maybe next time.  The second: what makes for a good writer.  Given I’m suffering from a bit of an irresolute mindset these days, that seemed a better option (and it never hurts to refresh/remind oneself in the process).  The third: have one of the gals from the Triple Threat Investigation Agency take over again.  Alas, they’re at a spa on Maui, having way too much fun.  The fourth: do an update re current writing projects,  but this seemed a bit of a snooze-fest and sailed out a window like a hastily pitched Frisbee. WPfrisbeeclipartimageDOTcom

A flip of the coin.  Ta-da!  What makes for a good writer it is.  The following comprises some key [reminder] points, with food-for-thought author quotes.  The first two I love—because they smack of truth.  While the first is fabulous, the second is cynical (if not a little frightening), but I get it.  <LOL>

“There are three rules for writing a novel.  Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.”  – W. Somerset Maugham

“Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout with some painful illness.  One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.”  – George Orwell

First things first.  Is talent a must to be a [successful] writer?  It doesn’t hurt, but it can be developed (I will swear to that).  You just have to make the commitment and . . . yes . . . do work hard.

“A writer never finds the time to write.  A writer makes it.  If you don’t have the drive, the discipline, and the desire, then you can have all the talent in the world, and you aren’t going to finish a book.”  – Nora Roberts

Make an effort to read, read, read . . . anything and everything.  You learn from others—their triumphs and their mistakes.  Open your mind.  Apply what you learn.

“If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time—or the tools—to write.  Simple as that.”  – Stephen King

Write as often as you can, whatever you can.  Let those fingers frolic on the keyboard or across the page (nothing wrong with the old-school approach).

“There is nothing to writing.  All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”  – Ernest Hemingway

Edit what you write.  If you’re new to editing, check out—and employ—editing and proofing guidelines and tips.

“A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.”  – Mark Twain

“It is perfectly okay to write garbage—as long as you edit brilliantly.” – C. J. Cherryh

Jot down concepts for stories and scenes in a journal.  They may not prove suitable for a current project, but they certainly could for another.

“Exercise the writing muscle every day, even if it is only a letter, notes, a title list, a character sketch, a journal entry.  Writers are like dancers, like athletes. Without that exercise, the muscles seize up.” – Jane Yolen

Set a writing schedule—even if it’s only one hour every Saturday and Sunday, and ten minutes every morning while chugging caffeine.  It’s a start . . . and demonstrates the aforementioned commitment.

“A writer who waits for ideal conditions under which to work will die without putting a word on paper.” – E.B. White

“The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.”  – Stephen Covey

“You can always edit a bad page. You can’t edit a blank page.” – Jodi Picoult

Stay focused.  Having Brucey the Birman on your lap is great for relieving stress and scratch-the-ears damn-you’re-cute moments, but maybe not so much when you’re attempting to focus/compose.

“You can do anything as long as you have the passion, the drive, the focus, and the support.”  – Sabrina Bryan

“Where focus goes, energy flows.”  – Tony Robbins

Utilize powerful verbs and strong adjectives/descriptions.  When writing fiction, aim to stay informal or conversational, as opposed to overly technical or formal.  Write with heart and soul.

“Strong words outlast the paper they are written upon.”  – Joseph Bruchac

“Words are a lens to focus one’s mind.”  – Ayn Rand

“A word after a word after a word is power.” – Margaret Atwood

Make sure to get input/feedback.  You need to know—and adjust—your weaknesses.  Take pride in your strengths.

“Learners need endless feedback more than they need endless teaching.” – Grant Wiggins

Lastly, here’s a great one from the amazing, witty Dorothy Parker . . .

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style.  The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”

 

 

 

 

The Chockablock Bucket

Given the Triple Threat Investigation Agency trio recently provided items on their bucket list I thought, why not do the same?  I’ve never typed one, so this seemed the perfect opportunity.  . . . The title was going to be “Kicking the Bucket” as in knocking it over and spilling the contents for all to view.   <LOL>  Took a couple of re-reads to realize that maybe that wouldn’t work quite as intended.

In no specific order, here are fifteen of 15 things to accomplish/achieve before closing these eyes in eternal sleep:

  1. Learn to swim (up and beyond doing a mean dogpaddle).
  2. Visit Japan and Korea (to eat authentic sushi and hear K-pop firsthand).
  3. Get a face-lift (only Shar-Peis should have multiple crinkles and wrinkles).
  4. Partake in a physical training regime (to have form where it should be).
  5. Experience a hurricane (they absolutely fascinate me, unlike tornadoes, which scare the <bleep> out of me).
  6. Learn to meditate (this cluttered mind is too easily distracted).
  7. Release a floating lantern . . . anywhere.
  8. Fly first class (what’s wrong with a little pampering?).
  9. Stay in an ice hotel for a weekend (sounds brrrrrr-racingly cool).
  10. Glide along a Venetian canal in a gondola (with a Bellini in hand, of course).
  11. Hover in a helicopter (no better way to cure a fear of heights).
  12. Kiss the 9-5 goodbye (knowing/trusting I could make it financially on my own).
  13. See The Triple Threat Investigation Agency books made into a TV series (as a proud “mother”, I want to see my “offspring” do well).
  14. Become business-savvy (I can barely differentiate between stocks and bonds).
  15. Teach/mentor (I always enjoyed tutoring and instructing).

If I aim for one or two a year, the list might just prove manageable.  The big question, however: which one do I do first? WPmybucketuse2

Lookin’ for a Laugh

Who couldn’t use a good laugh or chuckle?  I know I’ve been way too dry in the mirth department for way too long.  Maybe you have, too?  When life gets [way too] serious, embracing some humor and merriment is a very good thing. 

As such, I thought I’d deviate a bit today and post jokes related to writing and writers.  I’d love to claim them as my own, but sadly, I have no affinity for puns and gags.  In fact, the only one I can recall is:

Bon:  Did you hear about the peanut walking along the sidewalk?     Mot:  No.  What happened?     Bon:  He was assaulted!

Ha-ha, get it <nudge, nudge>?  He was . . . a salted.  Yeah, like I said, no affinity.  But I’m good at researching and searching, so here are a few jokes (posted on a number of sites) that just might bring a smile to that writer/blogger face. WPlaughAmyotto1

How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?  Two.  One to screw the bulb almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist.

How many screenwriters does it take to change a light bulb?  . . . Ten!

1st draft: Hero changes light bulb.
2nd draft: Villain changes light bulb.
3rd draft: Hero stops villain from changing light bulb. Villain falls to death.
4th draft: Lose the light bulb. 
5th draft: Light bulb back in. Fluorescent instead of tungsten.
6th draft: Villain breaks bulb, uses it to kill hero’s mentor.
7th draft: Fluorescent not working. Back to tungsten.
8th draft: Hero forces villain to eat light bulb.
9th draft: Hero laments loss of light bulb. Doesn’t change it.
10th draft: Hero changes light bulb.

Three guys are sitting at a bar.
#Guy1: “. . . Yeah, I make $75,000 a year after taxes.”
#Guy2: “What do you do for a living?”
#Guy1: “I’m a stockbroker.  How much do you make?
#Guy2: “I should clear $60,000 this year.”
#Guy1: “Awesome.  What do you do?”
#Guy2: “I’m an architect.”
The third guy has been sitting there quietly, staring into his beer, when the others turn to him.
#Guy2: “Hey, how much do you make per year?”
#Guy3: “I guess around $13,000.”
#Guy1: “Really?  What kind of stories do you write?”

A writer walks into a bar.  The bartender says, “Have you written 1000 words today?  You told me to not sell you a drink until you hit your word count goal for the day.”  . . . A writer walks out of a bar.

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you supposed to be finishing your current draft instead of reading jokes for writers?

WPlaughAmyotto1Then there are those witty comments/statements by authors and celebs that do wonders for prompting smiles and chuckles.

The road to hell is paved with adverbs.
♦  Stephen King

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.
♦   Doug Larson

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by that time I was too famous.
♦   Robert Benchley

Here’s one that comes under “funny food for thought”:

If writers were good businessmen, they’d have too much sense to be writers.
♦   Irvin Cobb

Here’s to a brighter day . . . smile, my friends, smile.

LaughterGifTenorDOTcom