What’s in a Number?

Kinda like in a name, as dear Will once penned (or is that “quilled”) for Romeo and Juliet.

WordPress emailed me my stats for May—“another successful month for your site is in the books!”  Never received one of these before.  Wow . . . those numbers were just so n-o-t great.  😂

Then I saw that they provided recommendations for “increasing traffic and engaging readers”.

Ignite your site”.

Love that phrase!  Yeah!  I want to set people’s interest on fire!  I want big numbers!

Ah, but the time factor …?  Time [still, at least for the interim] is just not my friend.  But I was curious.  What would this all entail? 

I clicked on one link.  “Uh oh.  Page not found.”  Clicked on another.  Another MIA page. 

I’m sure if I went searching, I’d find those pages somewhere in the internet/Wordpress cosmos.  I just don’t . . . yeah, you got it . . . have the time to do that.

Alas, the occasion to increase my numbers will have to wait.  But not forever.  Decisive action will prevail . . . when time [finally] allows.  😉

A Personal Push on the Professional Side

A petite promotional post.  A phantastic update. 😊

Firstly, The Triple Threat Investigation Agency series, Books 1-3—Collection—is available at:

https://books2read.com/u/3Gpd7a

Books 1to3 A

But the pretty private eyes, based in Hawaii, are also part of The Leading Ladies: A Sleuth Mystery Novel Collection.  I’m in the amazing company of Robin Murphy and Connie L. Beckett.

Robin is an Amazon best-selling author of a paranormal mystery series, and also writes chick-lit and non-fiction. She’s a speaker on author platforms, self-publishing, and marketing … among many other impressive things.

Connie writes in a variety of genres, no easy feat.  In addition to historical fantasy and middle-grade novels (as Teter Keyes), she’s penned the Gwen Lindstrom mystery series, which revolve around a cafe owner who works behind the scenes to investigate crimes.

You can find “our” book here:

https://books2read.com/u/b5WX5l

Collection A

The main marketplaces for distribution (besides Amazon, of course) are Apple, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and Google Play. Just a note, though: these links are a work-in-progress and all marketplaces might not be included yet.

Over time, Next Chapter will expand this link to include as many different editions of my books as possible, including audiobook, and various paperback and hardcover editions.

If you’ve read any of the books—from any of us—(or intend to, which would be most awesome), perhaps you’d be willing to leave a review in any of the marketplaces … ?

Three Cheers for Grandma

It’s been too long since I’ve given a fellow writer a thumbs’ up . . . so I’m doing that today.

jina (1)Jina S. Bazzar is one of the most prolific writers I know.  She has no fear of tackling any genre and does so exceptionally well.  She’s come far since the days of the Roxanne Fosch series, which were good stories to be sure, but she’s developed her craft prodigiously.

Jina’s latest book,  My Grandmother the Dinosaur Hunter, is written for young persons but could appeal to anyone of any age.  The “grandma” described in this story is her beloved mother, Miriam. Black the dog is also real. And the main characters are a young girl and boy.

Grandma’s adventure began as stories for her own kids.  Jina kept the stories wild, outrageous, and entertaining enough that her kids would retell the story to classmates, and even requested she recount it to friends and neighbors whenever they dropped by.

So, what’s My Grandmother the Dinosaur Hunter about?

Welcome to Cruxil, the planet adjacent to Earth, where horses can fly, dinosaurs exist, and magic is real.  When my sister and I went to Grandma’s for the weekend, I expected to spend my time playing games, eating sweets, and trying not to die from boredom. Little did I know that I’d spend the evening being chased by a dinosaur, attacked by a hydra, much less that I’d cap the night facing off with a giant frog.  I thought Grandma Mimi was a sweet, eccentric old lady with a walking stick and a penchant for gossip. And boy, was I wrong.

The stories are fun and she’s already received a five-star review from Michele E. Northwood, also a very talented author (Fishnets in the Far East and other entertaining reads).

Jina’s a freelance writer, a blogger, a mother, a baker, a chocolate fiend, a coffee enthusiast, and sometimes a poet. “A wanderer in this vast world, I’m just another body with a passion for the written word. There is no boundary I can’t cross, no limit I can’t push; my mind is my passport, my thoughts my mode of transportation.”

Please check her out …

https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B07B2989VT

https://www.facebook.com/JinaBazzarOfficial/

https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/17738345.Jina_S_Bazzar

Borborygmi …?

My/our new word for the week.

Given this post is dedicated to writing and editing, and the gals from the Triple Threat Investigation Agency (a Hawaii-based mystery series that sometimes borders on the silly and willy-nilly), I thought I’d attempt to get back to that, given I’d digressed a bit of late.  That, folks, is what might once have been called a run-on sentence.  But nobody seems to give a <bleeping bleep> about grammar and the like anymore.  So who really cares (but the few of us who still embrace syntax and the like)?  But I digress.  Again.

As my acupuncturist was inserting one of many needles, my stomach started to rumble—so loudly, it sounded like a famished moose, voracious rhinoceros, and ravenous Komodo dragon were in the room.

Dr. D asked if I knew what those stomach sounds were called.  Alas, I did not.  “Haven’t a clue,” I humbly confessed over the snorts of the rhino.

“Borborygmi.”

Borborygmi?  The sound of that word struck me as insanely funny.  I thought it might be fun to share a vid of that—and they do have them!—but they were pretty damn dry, not comical at all, save for one. A medical gent (so I assumed) was truly trying to sound very factual, and the more he got into it—sounding oh so serious and knowledgeable—the more I had to laugh.  We’ll spare him and not post that vid.  😉.

So, friends, our new word of the week—hmm, maybe we’ll make it the month—is borborygmi.  The noises your stomach makes … intestinal sounds that occur during the digestive process (hmm, given I’d not eaten for some 18 hours, I’m not so sure I was “digesting” anything at the time).  The smooth muscles that occupy our stomach squeeze food and gas through 30’ of small and large intestine.  This activity, called peristalsis, is what creates those stomach sounds.

Who knew!?  Well, I do now . . . and so do you.

Milestones & Memories

 milestone = important event, one that occurs at a critical time

memory = something that is remembered, mental representation

Not sure about the “important” or “critical”.  Yesterday was a milestone b-day and I ain’t sayin’ the number, but social media being what it is, I’m sure that number is out there somewhere.  As the lady in the commercial says, “Age is only a number, and mine’s unlisted”.  😉

I don’t feel old(er).  Too bad the mirror tells me I am.  I suppose a facelift is a possibility, but I don’t have 20K to spare, and from some I’ve seen, I’m not so sure I’d [truly] want to go there.  Lips kissing my earlobes—as in mine—is not that winsome a look.

FBmom1babcThe memories?  I buried my mom on Monday.  The service was short and pleasant.  And emotional.  When the celebrant played “Amazing Grace”, Niagara Falls erupted.

For decades, I took care of my mom.  Now, it’s time to take care of me, so people keep telling me.  And they’re right.  I’ve neglected myself in many ways.  I need to look after me—by wearing a new hat (like a lady at a royal ceremony might sport, though technically I suppose that would be called a  fascinator) and viewing life and the world with fresh [not fatigued or anxious] eyes, and maybe embracing that age that makes me wince and grimace.  Some people are good with getting older; they welcome it and wear it like a silver crown or a badge of honor.  Power to them. 

For the next week or so, I’ll likely continue to reflect on the memories [good, bad, sad] that have brought me to this milestone.  I’ll honor them . . . and I’ll offer gratitude to all that’s made me what I am today. 

And on that note-speaking of milestones and memories—I have a coronation to watch (and I’m not referring to that entertaining soap-opera-dense street)!

Hola

What an unexpected—and most pleasant—surprise.  The Connecticut Corpse Caper is available in Spanish!  Me encanta

CaperwithSPbio1ab

La Trampa del Cadáver de Connecticut (Los Misterios de Triple Amenaza Libro 1) has been added to Next Chapter’s distribution platform.  So, besides Amazon, La Trampa will soon be available in many main marketplaces, including: Apple, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and Google Play.

CaperSPuseA

The plan, over time, is to have as many different editions as possible, including audiobooks, paperbacks, and hardcovers.  So, I guess I’m back on the promo trail.  😉  Haven’t been there in a long, long time.  Wish me luck!

Here’s the link:

https://books2read.com/u/4AvrXK

If you have a second, please take a look . . . and do feel free to offer feedback.  😊  Muchas gracias mis amigos.

Beating Oneself Up / Patting Oneself on the Back . . . or . . . Is The Glass Half Empty?  Or Half Full?

It’s a “waffle” kind of day.  Not those lovely, yummy-nummy, round, flat cakes prepared in a frying pan or waffle-iron, served with fruit and/or syrup (maple’s my fave), and sometimes whipped cream.  The waffle that comes from not being able to make a decision—you know, wavering, vacillating, being indecisive about something. 

I’m waffling between beating myself up [again] for not conceiving of something enlightening / entertaining / stimulating / witty to post about and patting myself on the back for having gotten this far. 

As someone pointed out (thank you, my friend), I have written five books.  The “beater” in me thinks, ech, so what?  How many people have read them?  And based on why some people write (and have so much as stated), there’s no $ being made from it.  The “patter” thinks, yeah, I’ve written five books.  Published books.  And I’m working on my sixth.  That’s something to be proud of.

Having been a glass-half-empty kinda gal for way too long, it’s time to pull up the ol’ socks (gotta love those clichés).  And as I sit here, staring out the window, absently watching someone climb out of bed in the building across the street (sorry, dude), I tell myself I am going to do just that—pull up all three pairs (‘cause it’s [still] bleeping cool here).

The half-glass-full gal says thank you to those of you who provide positive/supportive comments; they mean a lot, truly!  This gal will figure things out and get back on the straight and narrow (yeah, it’s a cliché-filled morning but, sometimes, they serve so well).  It may not be tomorrow, or next week, or even next month.  She has a few things to put into perspective.  But she’ll get there.   

She’s embracing a new attitude and forging forward.  😊

Head Scratching

 . . . trying to figure out what today’s post should be about.  My onward move to getting my life organized [finally]?  My snail-slow progress re the sixth book in the Triple Threat Investigation Agency series? The new merch for two of the books?

Two plush velveteen blankets, by the by.  It’s unfortunate I’m not crazy about the covers (though “Forever Poi” isn’t too bad); I might be tempted to invest $62 in one.  Well, if I win the lottery, perhaps I’d just spend a few hundred and buy one of everything—new décor for the newly painted apartment.  😉

postsat2satpost1

I am so NOT anywhere near where I’d hoped to be with my blog and book.  Of course, things have been crazy-busy [but aren’t they always, one way or another?].  There’s a part of me that would love to retire and focus solely on my writing and editing; I’d enjoy that.  But maybe my body would go into [extreme] shock if I weren’t working like a madwoman 24/7, as it has been for decades. 

I envy writers and bloggers who write profound and/or enlightening posts.  Truly.  I believe I’m a very good editor and writer, but the latter only in terms of my books.  When it comes to conceiving concepts for posts, much less writing them, I suck.  Big time.  I’m like the deer in the middle of the freeway, caught in the Mack truck headlights. 

Hats off to my fellow writers; keep writing and entertaining/educating me.  Maybe your proficiency/talent/cleverness will one day rub off on me.  😉  In the meanwhile, I’ll just keep scratching my head and hoping something—any little something—will pop into my head so that I can provide a not overly dull/unimaginative post. 

A Quick & Simple Heartfelt Post

A most Happy Easter to those of you celebrating this commemorative holy time or for those of you simply enjoying the arrival of funny Mr. Bunny and his nummy-sweet treats.

Here’s to pleasant moments with family and friends … and remembering and honoring all the wonderful people, events, and everyday things in our lives we’re blessed to embrace.

Here’s to happiness . . . with a bit of a beat.  😉

At a Loss

On a few levels.

Loss of my mom.

Loss of sleep.

Loss of [manageable] time.

Loss of understanding why coworkers are not upfront about not having your work when you were on bereavement leave (and it takes an incident for that truth to come out).

At a loss knowing what to post about.

At a loss trying to figure out how to get back on top of things.

At a loss pondering the state of the world, politics, and human nature.

At a loss . . . wondering if spring will ever arrive or if, in July, we’ll simply slide into summer.  😉

I’m sure all will fall into place again at some point.  Speaking of “fall” though, right now, it feels like I’m hanging in a wishing well by my fingertips, struggling not to drop into the groundwater . . . or whatever else may be waiting below.

Here’s to wishing—to be embraced by the straight and narrow, the norm, the predictable, the routine . . . and welcoming the loss of loss.

Judy Hogan Writes

ramblings of an apprentice author

The Nightingale

Maria Konnel - Youg Adult Fantasy Author

Avisha Rasminda

Hi, I'm Avisha Rasminda Twenty-Two years old, Introduce Myself As A Author , Painter , A Poet.

Random Ramblings

Random rants, musings and opinions that nobody asked for :)

KRISHNA KUMAR SINGH

KNOWLEDGE AND TIPS

MisaeMich :)

...inspiration through words...

Fantasylife

Don't forget to be awesome!

JOURNEY towards the Perfect Communicator

Hi! I'm Rev. Fr. John Mark, Religious Priest, Spiritual Director of SLRP Youth Ministry

RovingBookwormNG

Books. Podcast. Poetry. Travel.

The Wild Heart of Life

Creative Nonfiction & Poetry

Wise & Shine

A community for writers & readers

She Got Wings!

Self-development

A Holistic Journey

Finding my way back out of motherhood -- while mothering

Joan Wiley

Wayward Writer

Robbie's inspiration

Ideas on writing and baking

Judy Hogan Writes

ramblings of an apprentice author

The Nightingale

Maria Konnel - Youg Adult Fantasy Author

Avisha Rasminda

Hi, I'm Avisha Rasminda Twenty-Two years old, Introduce Myself As A Author , Painter , A Poet.

Random Ramblings

Random rants, musings and opinions that nobody asked for :)

KRISHNA KUMAR SINGH

KNOWLEDGE AND TIPS

MisaeMich :)

...inspiration through words...

Fantasylife

Don't forget to be awesome!

JOURNEY towards the Perfect Communicator

Hi! I'm Rev. Fr. John Mark, Religious Priest, Spiritual Director of SLRP Youth Ministry

RovingBookwormNG

Books. Podcast. Poetry. Travel.

The Wild Heart of Life

Creative Nonfiction & Poetry

Wise & Shine

A community for writers & readers

She Got Wings!

Self-development

A Holistic Journey

Finding my way back out of motherhood -- while mothering

Joan Wiley

Wayward Writer

Robbie's inspiration

Ideas on writing and baking