Tootin’ Our Horns

You’ve got all three of us today—JJ, Rey, and Linda.  The Boss is OOO.

The three of us had a row, determining what to post about—something about Hawaii, editing/writing, or us (like Rey wanting to sound off about her few days in Cali and the <bleep> who led her on).  We couldn’t agree.  At all.  It wasn’t just tense, it leaned toward nasty.  So, there we were, tootin’ our horns—in loud, strident ways!

Then, it hit us, rather like a toppling palm frond during a tropical storm.  Why not post about . . . getting along?  He-he.

We agreed that the main thing to getting along is to listen.  With all the disagreeing and yammering, not one of us could hear what the other was saying.  So, pay attention; make an effort to grasp what’s being said, and appreciate it for what it is.   And, if you’re going to comment, don’t condemn or criticize.  Be subjectively objective.

Part of that not condemning or criticizing is keeping an open mind: know/learn all the facts.  Discuss but don’t dispute.  Agree to disagree—in that subjectively objective way.

Be optimistic or upbeat.  Negativity or pessimism can depress/stress others . . . push them away.  The air will be thick and tense, so the general environment will be far from pleasant or productive.

Of course, there’ll be times when feelings/moods can’t be bolstered.  Don’t be afraid to share why; be honest.  You may be surprised at the support you receive.  Accept it graciously and gratefully.

Be polite.  When the three of us get to arguing, we’re focused solely on ourselves.  We could care less what the other is saying (yelling).  It’s selfish.  Give room to others to voice what’s on their minds.  There may be some common ground there, which will allow the “conversation” to progress on a more positive note.  And if there isn’t, then discuss why your views or approaches (whatever the action or situation is) are different—and why that is a good thing.  Being different and having varying views—to use a couple of cliches—make the world go around and add spice to life.

Not an intensively edifying post, but some food for thought (another overused phrase, but appropriate).  On that ending note, we’re going to the mall; there’s a great sale going on, something Rey so enjoys.

Have an awesome Saturday . . . and give someone you don’t know a huge smile!

Judy Hogan Writes

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